Recipe for Disaster

First let me say that I love my dear brother-in-law. He is as good a man as you'll ever meet. He is kind and fun to be around and hard working. But tonight we had a laugh at his expense. (Shhhhh. Don't tell, I would never want to hurt his feelings.)

Today my sister called me. She told me about a recent meal he made: Alligator, mushroom and peanut butter chili.  Yes, you read that right.

Mr. T (my brother-in-law) and David went to the fish market when we were in Florida a couple of months ago. Mr. T bought alligator meat which they brought back home with them and have been keeping in their freezer. When my sister found it the other day she told him he needed to make something out of it before it went bad and the chili is what he decided sounded good. I think she was thinking along the lines of gumbo or something. When she told me about this chili, I couldn't help laughing. Alligator, mushrooms and peanut butter together has "epic fail" written all over it.

In his defense, Mr. T has made some awesome meals in the past. His gumbo is some of the silkiest, most delicious gumbo I've ever had. This is also the man who made us kimchi stuffing for Thanksgiving a few years ago. It wasn't my favorite but it wasn't awful either. He likes trying new things and sometimes it works out and sometimes. . . It. Doesn't. That happens to the best of us.

So, I was telling my boys about this chili (over our bowls of cold cereal that we had for dinner--at least he cooks, right?) and their comments had me spewing milk out my nose.

Me: Uncle P made alligator, mushroom and peanut butter chili.
Joel: (deadpan) Did he have his glasses on?
[This is where I spewed the milk]
Much laughter.
Danny: Mom are you laughing or crying.
Me: Both.
Seth: Did he make it up?
Me: No, I guess he found a recipe for it.
Seth: That's even worse.

Those were my sentiments as well. Who on earth thought such a thing would be a good idea and how were they brave enough to post such a recipe on the internet? (Now I must Google it to find out.)
In all fairness, I haven't actually tasted said chili so maybe it isn't all I'm imagining it to be.

Not sure I ever want to find out though.

P.S. I just looked and a Google search turned up this recipe. I'm willing to bet this it, so if you are a lot braver than I am and want to try it out, you can.

Digraph

     This evening Danny was reciting The Three Little Kittens. We have the Paul Galdone version and it is one of his favorites.

     "Oh, mudder dear..."
     "Say 'mother', not 'mudder'", I interupt.
     "Mudder"
     "No--bite your tongue like this: /th/", (for any linguists out there, /ð/).

     Danny places his tongue between his teeth and makes a perfect /th/ sound.
     I get excited, "Very good! Now say "moTHer"
     "Thh-mudder"

     We'll get it one of these days.
      In the meanwhile, I am very pleased with Daniel's progress in speech therapy on his /p/ sound and Nate's progress with /s/ just recently.


Oh, and as a random aside, today was crazy hair day at school for red ribbon week. We are kind of tame around here. Joel opted for a hat and Nate wanted a fauxhawk--nothing too wacky, but we still had to take his picture. He's a cutie.

What To Do In Winter

I found this drawing in my boys' room this morning. My ten year old recently made friends with  Bill Watterson ("Calvin and Hobbes") and  Gary Larson ("The Far Side").

Egad. We may need to find this kid a psychologist.

Ad-Libbing

Today was the annual children's program at church. The children work hard all year learning songs to sing about the theme for the year. Each child also has a speaking part. The message always centers around Jesus Christ and His gospel.

I look forward to this Sunday each year--and not just because it is the one Sunday where my children are under someone else's supervision--but because it is such a sweet, spiritual (and often funny) experience.  This year's program did not disappoint.

I waited excitedly for each of my boys to have their turn saying their part. We had practiced at home so I felt confident that they would do well.

Nate said his line with only a minor glitch of being in the wrong spot and saying his line before he was supposed to.

When it came time for Daniel to say his part, he was supposed to fill in the blank. The teacher said "I can follow the prophet by. . ." Daniel had practiced saying "being a good brother" but at the last minute he thought of something he wanted to say more:
He leaned into the microphone and clearly said, "Uhhh, my mom is awesome!"

I couldn't help it, I laughed out loud. So did a lot of other people.

He didn't get his line right, but it kinda made my day. I got lots of comments from friends after the meeting. I reassured everyone that no, I did not bribe him to say that. I really am just an awesome mom.

At least he thinks so.

Shenanigans

This morning I had to take Daniel with me to the chiropractor's office. David has a class that he is attending on Tuesdays and Thursdays and I didn't know about it when I scheduled my appointment. I was a little nervous but he sat there quietly and played with his cars and looked at his book. It was amazing.

He made up for it by running around like a crazy man the rest of the day. His shenanigans included pulling all the shoes out of the master bedroom closet, running away from home (at one time three of us were looking for him), dumping out a large bin of crafting supplies, pulling all the couch cushions off the couch multiple times, hitting his brother with a baseball bat (it was a plastic one, but still!), sneaking food out of the fridge, scattering Nate's school papers, stealing Joel's dinner and generally just being wild. I tried to diffuse some of the naughtiness by letting him run around outside for awhile. He played with the wagon and his car. He played in the sandbox. He especially liked using the bin we keep the dog food in as his stage and dancing around. He made up a funny little song about fire ants. I can't really understand everything he says but there is something about if "you get bitten by those fire ants then you die or get fired" and "See that ball? I'm going to get it when I'm done dancing" and a lot of "uh uh uh"s.


I love this kid, but this was one of those days when I was glad for bedtime.

Is There a Problem, Officer?

We worked hard this morning cleaning the boys' room. Yes, I've been watching episodes of "Hoarders" again. It is my motivation. I have a deep and abiding (though not very rational) fear that my life could spiral out of control and before I know if I will have stacks of fifteen year old National Geographics and Styrofoam meat trays creating mazes through my home that I will have to navigate as I shuffle around wondering where I left my teeth. Actually it would more likely be mountains of Legos and stacks of little boys jeans with holey knees. But I digress. Anyway, we worked long and hard and made major cleaning-out progress. This afternoon we rewarded ourselves with a trip to the movies to see "Cars 2".

When we got the the theater we still had several minutes until the movie started so David decided to run to K-Mart and pick up some candy to smuggle in. We do that occasionally. We just can't stomach paying $4.00+ for a box of Junior Mints. While he was gone we went in and took our seats. The previews were just starting when he got back.

He had literally run to K-Mart. It is only maybe 300 yards or so from the theater. He bought some Sugar Babies and JuJubes and started walking back to the theater. As he was crossing the parking lot of an empty appliance store he noticed a police car. It pulled out and slowly started following him. Sure enough, the officer wanted to talk to him. The conversation went something like this.
      Officer: Sir, I noticed that you ran across this parking lot a few minutes ago. You aren't wearing running clothes and I just wondered what you were doing.
      David: I'm going to the movies with my family and I was just buying some candy to bring in.
     Officer: Oh Okay. I do that too sometimes. But would you mind showing me some ID?
(At this point she had called in another officer for back-up so another officer arrived on the scene. Yes, really.)
     David: No, I don't mind (he starts to take out his wallet), but I know you. I am actually your next door neighbor.
(Pause. Recognition dons on the face of the officer. She looks slightly embarrassed.)
     Officer: Oh! You're the guy with the greyhound. Don't worry about it. Put your wallet away. Uh, sorry. Enjoy your movie.

At this point David left (chuckling to himself,  I'm sure) and made his way back to the theater to join us. I realize she was just doing her job and being a good police officer. Apparently the movie theater tends to be a place where trouble makers congregate in our town. I guess maybe David looked a little suspicious in his hat and sunglasses (in his defense he was wearing a cross country t-shirt and cross trainers so it wasn't like he was running across the parking lot in wingtips or anything though). At any rate, it makes a good story.

Did I ever mention that we live next to not one, but two police officers? The man is a k-9 officer and his grown daughter lives with him and she is the officer that David had the "run-in" with this afternoon. It actually makes me feel pretty safe while we are at home. I guess I need to watch out for weirdos by the movie theater though.